Wednesday, November 9, 2011

No NaBloPoMo Today

No prompt this morning. Just not feeling it right now, there's too much "other" on my mind.

Big snafu on my part last night. It's Agent M's week at my house, and usually on these weeks he stays the night once with my parents. Last night was that night, since I was going to be working until 9pm anyways. But I had forgotten that The Ex and I had swapped days yesterday, and Agent M was supposed to go to the other house last night.


Of course, my being at work meant that I couldn't answer my mobile when The Ex and my Mum were trying to call me. The Ex called my Mum, Mum kept trying to call me, Agent M was unhappy that he couldn't finish Monopoly with my parents, and I was oblivious to all the going-ons. When my Mum called my work, the girl who answered had not seen me and told her I was not there.

Apparently, a small batch of chaos ensued as my Mum then worried that I was dead in a ditch somewhere.

Finally, Mum got through to me. Slight more chaos, and a few phone messages left for The Ex, of me apologizing and asking to talk to Agent M. Eventually I was able to talk to Agent M, who was more forgiving then I expected him to be. Unfortunately, to make things right, he will be spending the night at my parents tonight, so I will not get to wake up tomorrow morning to him climbing into bed and asking for Harry Potter stories. (We both have Thursday off of work/school and other then an attorney appointment for me and soccer practice, we planned to spend the whole day together).

I really am upset over how little I have gotten to see Agent M this week, and I am trying hard to not be annoyed at not getting to at least see him on my lunch breaks today and Friday, but it is what it is. I can't expect my parents to shuttle him across town to my work, just for an hour visit. I am upset to be working so many night shifts this week, but I am looking for a new job that will not make my hours so unpredictable, there's nothing else I can do about it. I am nervous about the appointment with my attorney tomorrow and attorney appointments always make me just want to hole up with Agent M and soak up every minute I can of our time together. But, I can't.

It also does not help that I am all sorts of PMS-y, so simply thinking of the crap The Ex and his attorney have responded with make me want to pull out my hair, stomp my foot in injustice, and cry. His response pretty much ignored everything my attorney and I had gone over and sent to them, so I have a lot of papers to get together again and a lot of questions that I want answered and a lot of muck to point out and drag ourselves through. Why can't this just be easier?

With all of these things on my mind, I barely slept last night. I woke up this morning and could not focus myself to any one project, save for going through emails and a chat with The Swede. Speaking of which, the Swede made my morning a little bit happier, though. He sent me a photo of himself in his work uniform, which I have been wanting to see for some time now. He is so damn handsome in it. I am a sucker for uniforms and getting that photo this morning made me grin like a Cheshire cat. Instead of letting the snafu from yesterday, the sad stuff from today, and the anxious feelings about tomorrow's appointment get me down, I guess I should think of that photo as my reminder to find the good bits.

With that in mind, now I get to head to work. Maybe tonight I will post a response to the prompt.

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