Friday, March 9, 2012

Counting Weeks

It seems like I don't live my life day to day. It is ruled and managed by weeks. Usually there is only the scheduling of who's house Agent M is at, as I plan things in "every other week" time slots, since he goes to his dad's house for a week, then our house for a week. But the passages of time have become even more glaringly apparent in the last few weeks, as due dates for midterm papers and projects and the Swede's arrival have all marched closer and closer.

School is flying by, leaving me to wonder at times if I am retaining enough. I have a small calendar that I keep in my binder that has the due dates for projects and papers, the dates for all of Agent M's field trips until the end of  his school year, and the dates and times of each of my classes, among other bits and bobs. Unfortunately, having such a well planned out calendar did not prevent me from thinking I had one more week to finish the Midterm Project I have due on Monday, and the Midterm Paper and Exam that are on Wednesday. With that one realization, I went from feeling confident in how I was managing my classes to feeling massively overwhelmed and behind.

As for the Swede - it has been about six months since we last saw each other face to face, but in less than three weeks I will be picking his up from the airport for an almost-three-week long visit. My feelings on his visit have become so muddled and mixed. I am anxious, excited, nervous, and hoping I can get the house cleaned up more before he gets here. Oddly enough I am also a bit sad about it. He and Wonder Twin (best guy friend, not mentioned here before, I don't think...) are a bit like oil and water at this point which means that during the Swede's visit, I will not see Wonder Twin. It might not sound like a big deal, but this is someone I am used to seeing 3 to 5 times a week. Also, with money being so tight still, I am unsure what to plan while he visits and am a bit worried that he will be bored or, worse, that we will not have the means to buy food for the meals I want to make and go to the places we have talked about going to. In general, I am excited to see him and miss him so, but what if he gets here and I am a disappointment?

I have more I want to say, but as it is I am falling asleep while typing and have to be up, dressed, and leaving for work in 7 hours. I will definitely revisit this topic later.

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